Insomnia is something I have struggled with for years. The first time I was told I had insomnia, I was 14. Because yes, even at 14 I had so much stress in my life, I never slept. But over the years it has just gotten worse. I had tried every thing in the world to try and sleep. I cut out caffeine, drank warm milk, which is yucky by the way. Lol I had taken warm baths, tried sleep remedies such as herbal teas. Cut out all technology and nothing in this world seemed to work. I just didn't know what to do.
I had become sooo exhausted that I couldn't even stand myself any longer. On average I would get about 3-4 hours of sleep and get up in the morning and go at full force. Because being a single mommy of 3 keeps you on your toes! So I went and seen a doctor about it finally.
I have tried every single medication in this world that you can think of, even more natural things like "Melatonin" but something just wasn't right. Even to this very day I am still not sure what is going on. I have been on medication after medication and some worked. I would drift off to sleep just fine, but come a few hours later I was right back up again and that was just as exhausting as getting no sleep at all! So something had to give. I told my doctor and told her, this is just not right. My body should react to medication, at least in the smallest bit, but it doesn't.
So after awhile, my primary doctor thought it would be best if I seen a therapist. Not just because I wasn't sleeping but because of the millions of other things that are going on in my life that I have little to no control over. Because I have felt defeated. So I have been seeing a therapist for awhile now and she has helped me to better understand just what is going on with me and what is going on with my body and help me sort out the reasons as to why I am not sleeping.
The last time I couldn't sleep, would be right at this very moment. It's almost 12:30am and I am sitting here blogging my little heart out, and why? Because I am stressed out beyond belief. And when I am stressed it's like my body and mind go into overdrive and I can't concentrate, I really can't sleep and I am constantly worried about everything and anything. Even at the end of the day, when most parents put their children to sleep, they consider it their "me" time to wind down before bed and just relax. But with me, there is no such thing as relaxing because my body and mind are constantly running amok.
The best remedy for my sleepless nights is usually blogging. I can get everything out in the open and vent and maybe someone down the line will "hear" what I have to say. That really does help me sometimes. Or I will try and read a book. Because there isn't a medication or remedy in this world I haven't tried. But I am definitely open to any and all suggestions. Because nothing else I do seems to work
So late nights.. I am on facebook or blogger. It's my me time, my down time. Blogging has helped me out a lot. And my therapist has said that the more I talk about things and get them in the open, the less stress I will feel and the easier it will become for me to sleep at night.
Is she right? I guess only time will tell!
...Until tomorrow my friends!!!
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