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Monday, July 9, 2012

I'm Crazy And I Know It..

So, everything in my life is screwed to hell right now and I can't do anything about it. So fuck it. I am just rolling with things one day at a time. What else can I do? I have been using humor to get through my days, because if I don't, I swear every part of me will have the emotional and mental breakdown I so deserve. I really do need a vacation, but since I can't afford one I have decided that this weekend Im just gonna drink until I don't know where I am, ta da! Vacation lol

But what is with this heat? I seen on the news tonight, that a total of 74 people have died due to the heat... Umm Satan has called, he wants his weather back! For the loveeeee it's sooo damn hot outside the bodies in my freezer are starting to thaw. What am I going to do now? I could bury them but they will resurface at some point, I am sure of it. So I guess it's time Satan takes his weather back, its so damn hot out you can't even breathe out there! It just takes your breath away. So he needs to take his heat back so my bodies will stop thawing out, they are starting to smell. My neighbors might get suspicious....

So the little horse tank I have for my kids to play in has turned green. I swear if I am not out there cleaning it every day, it turns green in like 2 days. Its going to jack up my water bill for sure. Why can't water just be free anyways, its WATER for God's sake. I think that water should be free, for the record. Because it's costing me a fortune to keep my kids cool in the pool! Speaking of pools, I called them to find out how much it is for a pool pass for the summer and it's $175. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? All that just to get in a pool that Im sure kids pee in every 10 minutes! I mean really? That is just ridiculous. Water should be free and it should be free to swim in too! Especially with all this damn heat that's going on.

So I started a bucket list, I figure I have a fucket list already, why not a bucket list too! I decided I wanna go kiss that damn blarney stone just to see what it's all about. I mean, does it really bring you anything to kiss that damn thing? Im not thinking it does, but what do I have to lose at this point? Lol

I also want to go bungee jumping. I have this fear that once I jump, the rope is just gonna break and Im gonna die anyways.. So why not have an adrenaline rush while Im at it? Why the hell not.. I would have nothing to lose at that point either.

I'd also like to have a naked butler and a naked maid my last days. That away I have things cleaning and bending over for me when I get old and can't do it anymore. That would be awesome. Of course at this point I am hoping my kids are gone, but whatever. I'm not picky. Oh and I'll take a pool boy too, just because its my bucket list and I can do that.

Ohh, I would also love to have sex in an elevator before I die. Not sure why, but sex is on my mind tonight and that would be very fun to have sex in an elevator. Has anyone tried it before? I know I want too before I die. I don't think there is anything I wouldn't do sexually, but we won't get that explicit tonight, Im too tired hahahahahhaaha I'd also like to bang Channing Tatum while Im at it. WOW he is one hot mofo and if I could have kids, I would have 10 of his! Him and I could make some hot lil indian babies! hahahahahaha

Ohhh I have a lot on my bucket list. But these were just some things that were on my mind tonight. Im crazy and I know it. But aren't all the awesome people in the world a little slightly unhinged?

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