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Saturday, March 3, 2012

Death And All Her Friends....

Death is something that we ALL go through. Whether it's been family, a friend or whoever. You have experienced death and all her friends.

Last night, I learned that someone really close to me passed away. He was my very first love!  When him and I decided years ago that we couldn't be together, we were the best of friends. He was my BEST friend. The only person I could ever count on. It wouldn't matter what it was, I could drunk dial him at 3am just to talk to him. He was the love of my life and the best friend anyone could ask for.

Last night (3/2/12) he was driving home from work and was T-boned by a drunk driver that killed him instantly. Instantly I had HATE for those who drink and drive. But I can't be a complete hypocrite, because I myself have been in trouble for drinking and driving, the only difference is that I learned my lesson the FIRST time it happened... (8 years ago) and it hasn't EVER happened since. I have hate, frustration and just plain anger. His life was taken because someone else was SELFISH enough to do such a thing.

I miss my best friend. I miss him with all of my being, and there is nothing I can do about it. All I can do is have pure hate, anger, and sadness for what has happened. And I can't help but wonder..

Was it just his time? Was it Karma? Was it just his time? Death and all her friends... I wouldn't wish death upon my worst enemy... Death and all her friends...

Im sooo sad, and I am having a lot of problems dealing right now. He was a great man. He was a great man with a great and beautiful woman and 3 very young children. He was also younger then me... How do you deal with something like that?

It's like AA... Taking things one day at a time? Well... for tonight, I just don't wanna deal...

6 comments:

  1. I''m sorry for the loss of your friend. My advice is to 'trust' that it was just meant to be and not question "why." Then maybe, you'll have no reason to be anger. I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be angry. Try to let it go when it comes. Best of luck to you and hang in there today.

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  2. Tonight is for memories. I'm so sorry for all of you.

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  3. Most of us have been where you are and it isn't a good or pleasant place. It is sad, it is lonely and it is one of those times to lose yourself in prayer. Hand the hurt to God, pray for strength, pray for peace of mind and I will do the same for you. It doesn't matter why, or who or how. He's gone and he is now receiving his reward for his time here on earth.
    Cry your tears for your own lose, not his. Cry for his family and their loneliness and feel whatever you are feeling, but you have to release the anger because who and how and why don't matter. Nothing changes because you hate or you seek revenge except that your own heart hurts more.
    God will give you peace, He knows the why, how and who and He will hold your heart while it heals.
    (((hugs)))) and many good thoughts coming your way. ♥

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  4. I am so sorry about your friend, what awful news. I wish there was something I could say to make things easier, but like you said - you need to take it one day at a time. My thoughts are with you, all my love xxx

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  5. Thank you for the kind words. Death is difficult for anyone, but when it happens out of the blue it always takes you by surprise. He was only 25 years old, younger then myself even. It has me thinking a lot about my own life these days. One day at a time is all we can do for now!

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  6. How terribly sad!! I am so sorry for your loss. It had to be his time to go, but it doesn't make the loss any less heart wrenching. My heart goes out to you.

    Kathy
    http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com

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